Hey! Shanny's one of the choices in Sportsnet.ca's Power Poll today!

So I was wandering around hockey pages, as I'm wont to do, and came across the following.



and sent it to realitycek, Rowan, and Cee, as is also my wont.

Realitycek came back with: "Go in peace, children, and high-stick no more. While anyone's looking. If you can help it. And remember -- away game at Mordor, on the 28th."

which still has us rolling. So Cee had the brilliant idea to propose a caption contest. Go for it!

I reprint this in its entirety because, well...because it needed to be said.

The NHL's going south
By MIKE ULMER -- Toronto Sun

Remember those plucky Carolina Hurricanes, the team that would induce the locals to forsake college hoops and NASCAR for sticks and pucks?

Thought you should know, they're averaging 14,700 fans a night.

The Hurricanes fell three wins short of the Stanley Cup last spring. Their attendance is 1,800 fans per evening lower than that of the Calgary Flames who haven't made the playoffs in seven years.

Let's put this another way. The last time the Flames played a post-season game, the Carolina Hurricanes were the Hartford Whalers.

This suggests two things.

1. Martin Gelinas, who came to Calgary from Carolina over the summer, has a secret charisma and a really, really, really big family.

2. It's time someone started reconsidering the game's wavering hold on sports fans south of the 49th.

The great lie about the National Hockey League is that it's a league in which American teams prop up Canadian clubs.

It's more like the other way around.

Yes, it is simplistic to tie a club's financial health to attendance numbers so highly fudged you have to brush your teeth after repeating them. The league quietly mandates at least 500 freebie tickets a night and that number can often swell to 2,000 or more against a poor opponent.

And yes, American teams operate differently than Canadian clubs.

The Hurricanes, for example, have a sweet lease deal in which they garner revenues from other events staged in the RBC Center, formerly the Entertainment and Sports Arena.

TESTIMONIAL

But attendance does say an awful lot about local interest and that, in turn, speaks volumes about long-term prospects. There is no finer testimonial than bums in the seats.

The U.S. may have 10 times the population, but Canada has a whole lot more hockey fans.

Take a look around the NHL.

They are wringing their hands in Ottawa, where sluggish ticket sales dropped the Sens' average attendance down to 14,847. That's an 11% decline from last season.

The Senators still average more patrons a night than the Chicago Blackhawks, New York Islanders, Pittsburgh Penguins, Carolina Hurricanes, Buffalo Sabres, Nashville Predators, Mighty Ducks of Anaheim and New Jersey Devils. Their visibility in their home city dwarfs that of the U.S. clubs and their 8,500 season tickets would be looked on by team executives in those U.S. burgs as a wonderful number.

Imagine Sens owner Rod Bryden in handcuffs. The equivalent happened in Buffalo to former president John Rigas.

Without an owner and with a colourless, predictable team, the Sabres are playing in front of as many empty seats as occupied ones.

Buffalo is averaging 11,518 over four dates. That's a 29% drop from last season.

When the Ducks and Florida Panthers entered the league, NHL types salivated at the thought of aligning themselves with the likes of Blockbuster Video and Disney. It turns out 30 guys in Edmonton can do a much better job of running a hockey team. Who knew?

In Pittsburgh, current home address of the greatest player in the game, the Penguins announced 1,649 empties for their home opener against the Toronto Maple Leafs. In Mario Lemieux's home town of Montreal, the Canadiens have averaged 20,048, or 5,000 more a night than in Pittsburgh.

WAKE UP

Don't worry about the Senators, a team situated in the Canadian city hit hardest by the high-tech meltdown.

Worry, if you must, about Chicago, where the Blackhawks had one announced crowd of 10,192, most of whom came in the same bus. On many nights, the actual gate is closer to 8,000.

And in Ottawa, unlike Chicago, if your car breaks down en route to the game you still get to live.

Hey, Canada, wake up. The Vancouver Canucks are a better draw than the Los Angeles Kings.

Four thousand more fans a night go to a hockey game in Edmonton than in Nashville. The Predators are down 8% and their announced gate of 10,123 against Phoenix was the lowest in the team's history -- by more than 2,000 fans.

The Oil, by comparison, are up 9% and boast nearly 15,000 season tickets.

Overall, league attendance is virtually identical to last season's pace. For that fact, the boys in New York can thank the patrons of the frozen North, where the game matters and, if you don't mind me saying, where it always will.


(Contributed by Kellie, hockey-fan-in-the-making!)

That's putting it nicely...

The referees took a break from the mandated league crackdown on obstruction, as there were several noncalls, including a hook of Forsberg on an OT breakaway.

(from the Denver Post Online)

I should add that Steve is NOT wearing his helmet and therefore the Sacred Book of Steve is a worthy companion to the Sacred Book of Ray (and Joe).

I'm so happy hockey season has started. Three Avs games in a row, too, and Adam playing a great game in all of them.

And I'm also happy because my son's become enamoured of NHL Hitz 2002 for GameCube and he's impressed that I'm able to answer the trivia questions between periods for more points. Hell...I'm impressed. I didn't know that I knew that Guy Lafleur came back to play for the Rangers, or that JR was only the 4th Blackhawk to score more than a hundred points. Hee!

great article...no picture!

Avs notch first victory By Adrian Dater
Denver Post Staff Writer
Friday, October 18, 2002 - LOS ANGELES - The beginning and the end were completely believable. Of the four Colorado Avalanche goals on Thursday night, Peter Forsberg scored two and Joe Sakic one. It was the second goal, the game-winner, that seemed like pulp fiction.

Adam Foote doesn't get many breakaways, nor does he get many goals. But he got both on what proved the difference maker in the Avalanche's first victory of the season, 4-1 over the Los Angeles Kings at the Staples Center.

Between the bookend Forsberg goals, Foote scored 6 minutes, 32 seconds into the third period to break a 1-1 tie, seconds after coming out of the penalty box. As Foote came out from serving a minor boarding penalty against Kings star Jason Allison, he slipped behind Kings defender Lubomir Visnovsky at the red line, barely staying onside to receive a lead pass from Avs forward Brad Larsen.

Foote broke ahead of Visnovsky and waited for Kings goalie Felix Potvin to commit before slipping a shot up high to the back of the net

"You always dream of one out of the box like that," Foote said. "I wasn't sure if I was going to be offsides or not. When I didn't hear any whistle, I just kept going."

mmmmmmmm.............

A goal! A *goal* off the penalty bench! The GAME winning goal! And an assist to Mighty Joe's first of the season! And he was laughing and happy and...and...*what* a goal! Gotta love it!

Hey. When the object of your affection is a defenceman, you have to celebrate his goals with champagne and caviar, 'cause he only gets five a season.

Go, Adam!

And, yeah, Fuckberg, how come you only score when you're threatened? Don't you think it's time to stop sulking and earn your money? Two goals tonight, keep it up, eh.

Preach it, Bob. Preach it.

Colorado coach Bob Hartley was fuming after the loss, which ended the season-opening, two-game homestand for the Avs with a record of 0-1-1.

"Our best players have to be our best players. It's going to be a dogfight all year long," said Hartley, obviously displeased with the performances of Joe Sakic and Peter Forsberg. "We're at a stage in the NHL right now that you can't say if our best players show up for half the regular-season games we're going to be in good shape. Those guys have to dominate every game."

Fuckberg's just punching his time card like he was in Games 6 and 7. I sure would have liked to have seen Billy Guerin on the Avs too. And trading Drury...not worth it, Bob, not worth it. If you were gonna trade a forward, why not trade Tanguay, who's also decided to apparently just punch his time card this year too?

NHL Center Ice

So they're running promos for Center Ice. I happen to already have it so on one of the channels this evening they seem to be running the entire series of..."Rooming with Roenick." I've gotten to see Anson beat JR at air hockey, JR cooking, JR getting cheesecake taken away from him, and watching four guys watch hockey 24-7.

I wanna room with Roenick!

I have to tell you, Todd, I have conceived a sudden and newfound liking for the Kings fans. Any group that has the chutzpah to boo Gary Bettman, and chant "no more nets!" is a-oKAY in MY book.

The Avs looked good tonight, off to their usual slow start, but Morris is fitting in better, and is more of a team player, than that foot disease ever was. Turco seems to be just as nasty a goalie as Belfour, but at least he's a *better* one, so on the whole I think the Stars did trade up.

We have decided to buy a new television. A 19" screen isn't big enough to see Adam on from across the room.

Our intrepid correspondent, Kellie, found this article predicting the 2003 Stanley Cup Winner. You read it here first.

ray, come back...

Ray Bourque, that is.

I don't really understand why the Avs are so willing to throw away power forwards - especially forwards who are good in the clutch, like Podein and Drury - for defencemen that have been, so far, marginal at best and losers at worst. Kasparaitis, the foot disease? Lasted a whole three months, did shit in the playoffs. For that they lost Shjon Podein?

And it seems to be happening again with Morris. Nothing against him, but to trade a forward like Drury for a 24 year old DEFENCEMAN seems...shortsighted at best. INSANELY stupid at worst.

*sigh*

gee, those were the days

from Rocky Mtn News Online:

As violent as some of the Avalanche-Detroit Red Wings games have been, the rivalry pales in comparison to what took place when the Nordiques and Canadiens got together.

"The games between Montreal and Quebec were more important than to go to church on Sunday," said Hartley, who grew up in a predominantly French-speaking town on the Quebec-Ontario provincial line. "I'm sure if they would have played during the day there wouldn't have been a kid in school."

The animosity between the teams reached its peak on April 20, 1984, during Game 6 of the Adams Division finals at the Montreal Forum. In what became known as "the Good Friday Massacre," one of the ugliest brawls in hockey history broke out at the end of the second period.

"It was awful, terrible," Goulet said. "Emotions were way out of control. It's something that never should have happened."

The Nordiques, needing a victory to extend the series to a seventh game, had a 1-0 lead when fighting on the ice escalated into a benches-clearing brawl. It got worse when Quebec enforcer Louie Sleigher sucker-punched Montreal's Jean Hamel and knocked him unconscious.

Players from both teams eventually went to the locker rooms, but the brawling continued when they returned to the ice for the third period. Sleigher had been ejected, but in that era he was allowed to come out for the warm-up. When Canadiens players saw Sleigher in uniform, they thought he still was eligible to play and went after him.

"There was too much intensity; you could say hate," said Ladoceur, who covered the game. "Guys were fighting in the press box, and fans were fighting in the stands. It was really, really ugly."

Order eventually was restored, several players were ejected, and the Canadiens pulled out a 5-3 victory to clinch the series.

rough 'n tumble!
From Denver Post Online:
The more significant issue is whether Colorado will be asking too much of Skoula and perhaps also Greg de Vries in the top two pairs. They will be mixed and matched with Colorado's proven elite defensemen, Blake and Foote. And the other concern must be that the rough-and-tumble Foote has been injury-prone in recent years, missing an average of 29 games during the past four seasons.

mmmmf! Well, not about the injuries. But, you know. The rest of it.

I really really need hockey season to get here...

hey. I'm on lunch.
Greatest athlete, period. Heh. Go, Insane Bowl Haircut Man.

it's NOT stupid to buy jerseys!

Holmstrom plays after his clothes call

Wing gets fan's sweater on loan, scores in loss

September 20, 2002

BY NICHOLAS J. COTSONIKA, FREE PRESS SPORTS WRITER
GRAND RAPIDS -- How much do the fans love the Red Wings in western Michigan? They'll give them the shirts off their backs.

Literally.

Take Teri Rodriguez. The 46-year-old Newaygo resident came to the Wings' intrasquad game at Van Andel Arena on Thursday night wearing an autographed, replica Tomas Holmstrom sweater. She never dreamed she would lend it to him, and that he would wear it, and that he would score in it as his White team lost to the Red team in a shootout, 3-2. But that's what happened.

aw, and I missed it!

3rd Period Penalty Summary

1:19, Colorado, Smith: 5 Minutes for Fighting
1:19, Dallas, Gosselin: 5 Minutes for Fighting
9:37, Colorado, Saviels: 2 Minutes for Holding
10:00, Colorado, Foote: 2 Minutes for Roughing
10:00, Colorado, Blake: 2 Minutes for Cross Checking
12:47, Dallas, Ott: 2 Minutes for Charging
14:52, Dallas, Henenius: 2 Minutes for High Sticking
16:57, Dallas, Ott: 5 Minutes for Fighting
16:57, Dallas, McCormick: 5 Minutes for Fighting

Shanny calls for more Original Six matchups.

The Detroit Red Wings only face Original Six teams outside their division seven times this season, while matching up with Nashville and Columbus five times each.

Hey! The Jackets have Cassels now! Be afraid! Be afraid! Why...why are you laughing?

Roy article *plus* Adam scoffing in it! what more can we ask for?

what more can we ask for?

from ESPN:

Yes, it's possible that if Roy has a substandard season and playoff run and his skills obviously are eroding, we could look back at those two games against the Red Wings as the harbinger. But neither Roy nor anyone around him seem to be considering that possibility.

"We haven't even thought about that sort of criticism," said Joe Sakic. "Patrick was the best player, in our minds, in the league last year. He got us where we were. This year's a new year, and we want to get back to the same spot and give it another shot."

Colorado winger Chris Drury has been in the sporting spotlight since he was the winning pitcher in the 1989 Little League World Series.

"He's mentally the strongest athlete I've ever been around," Drury said of Roy. "I don't think there will be any scars, effects or nightmares. Obviously, he was not too happy with it that night or a few days after, but he's so strong mentally, he's fine in my book."

Defenseman Adam Foote scoffed.

"A pretty small percentage of the goalies in the league have done HALF of what he's done," Foote said. "I know him well, and having him behind us still is a huge bonus for this team."

Colorado coach Bob Hartley said, "We knew who we were facing, and we also know where we did some things wrong. Sometimes you have to learn in either victories or defeat, whether we would have been beat in OT or by a touchdown, at this time there is no effect."

And his goaltender specifically?

"He's been there before," Hartley said, alluding to the Red Wings' 11-1 rout of the Canadiens in December 1995, with Roy in the net. "And look how he bounced back. The goalie? That's the least of my worries."

For his part, Roy appears to be as hungry as ever, given his early camp work and his conditioning.

"This is the 19th time I have participated in a training camp," he said. "It's never boring. There are two ways to look at it. You can be here and say, 'Aw, I don't care' or, 'What can I do to improve my game?' That's the way I like to look at it."



Not gonna comment about 'behind' and 'huge.' I'm trying to maintain some decorum here...but I always knew goalies had bigger sticks...

from sportsnet.ca:

If the NHL follows through with its stricter rules enforcement -- and Bettman says he will demote on-ice officials who refuse to make the calls -- it will be far more difficult for offence-strapped teams such as the Minnesota Wild to compete.

And pigs might fly out my...

I mean, come on, this *is* the same commissioner who looked stupidly at the television last year during the playoffs and didn't blink an eye at the calls that were so bad even Sports Illustrated noticed.